A Beginner’s Guide to Sexual Wellness

Whether you're just beginning your journey or brushing up on the basics, this guide is designed to help you feel empowered, informed, and ready to explore your pleasure with confidence. No pressure, no shame — just real talk, expert tips, and tools to help you discover what feels good for you.

Jump to a section:

Sexual Wellness 101
Choosing Your First Sex Toy
Understanding Lube & Toy Materials
How to Clean & Care for Your Toys

Sexual Wellness 101

Before toys, positions, or playlists — let’s start with the basics.

Sexual wellness isn't just about pleasure, it's about confidence, comfort, communication, and feeling empowered in your own body. Here's a deeper look at the core building blocks of a healthy, informed sexual journey.

Consent is Everything

Consent is not just a “yes” — it’s clear, enthusiastic, and ongoing. That means:

You can say yes and change your mind later.
Consent should never be assumed, it must be communicated.
It's just as important in long-term relationships as it is in casual encounters.

Healthy consent is about mutual respect and clear communication. It should feel safe, pressure-free, and fully agreed upon by everyone involved.

Know Your Body

Every body is different and that’s a beautiful thing.
Whether you have a vulva, a penis, both, or are non-binary, understanding your anatomy helps you:

Discover what feels good.
Communicate more clearly with partners.
Increase body confidence and reduce shame.

Learning about erogenous zones, how arousal works, and how your body responds to touch is one of the most empowering things you can do for your sexual wellness.

Self-Pleasure is Normal (and Healthy)

Exploring your own body is a powerful way to:

Discover what turns you on
Reduce stress and release tension
Build a stronger connection to your body
Boost confidence in partnered experiences

There’s no “right” way to experience solo pleasure, it’s about what feels good to you. Using your hands, a toy, or simply your imagination are all valid ways to connect with yourself.

Normalizing self-pleasure helps break down shame and build up self-love.

Communication is Part of Wellness

Even though it's not always talked about, open communication about pleasure, desires, and boundaries is essential to healthy sexuality. Whether with a partner or with yourself, listening to your body and speaking up for your needs is a huge part of wellness.

Choosing Your First Sex Toy

Shopping for your first sex toy? You’re not alone — and you’re definitely not the only one feeling a little overwhelmed by the options. The good news? It doesn’t have to be complicated. Finding the right toy is all about knowing what feels good to you, going at your own pace, and being open to trying something new.

Start Simple and Friendly

When you're brand new to toys, it’s best to start with something approachable:

A bullet vibrator is small, quiet, and designed for clitoral stimulation — perfect if you want something easy to use and not too intimidating.
A slim silicone dildo offers gentle internal play and lets you explore penetration at your own comfort level.
If you’re curious about both internal and external stimulation, a dual-stimulation toy like a rabbit vibrator might be a great all-in-one pick.

These beginner-friendly designs give you a chance to explore without pressure or complexity.

What Sensation Are You Looking For?

Understanding the types of sensation you enjoy can help narrow your options:

Do you like external stimulation (clit, nipples, perineum)? Go for a vibe that’s small, gentle, or teasing.
Curious about internal pleasure? Look into dildos, G-spot vibrators, or even slim anal plugs.
Want to keep your hands free? Try a grinder, panty vibe, or remote-controlled toy.

There’s no “right” answer — only what your body responds to with comfort and pleasure.

Things to Keep in Mind

Stick to body-safe materials. Look for toys made of medical-grade silicone, ABS plastic, glass, or stainless steel. These are non-porous and easier to clean.
Choose rechargeable when possible. Batteries are fine, but rechargeable toys tend to be stronger and more sustainable.
Noise level matters. If privacy is important to you, read reviews or choose a toy marked as “quiet” or “whisper soft.”
Check for waterproof features if you want to play in the shower or bath.

Go Easy on Yourself

Remember, your first toy is just the beginning — not a lifelong commitment. You’re allowed to explore, experiment, and change your preferences over time.

If a toy doesn’t feel right, that’s okay. It doesn’t mean anything is wrong with you. It just means you haven’t found your favorite yet, and half the fun is in the discovery.

Need help choosing? Take our quiz and find your perfect match!

Understanding Lube & Toy Materials

Lube makes everything smoother, more comfortable, and a lot more fun. But not all lubes work with all toys. Here's your quick guide to choosing the right type of lube and knowing which materials are best for your body and your toys.

Lube Comparison Chart

Lube Type	Best For	Toy Use	Pros	Things to Note
Water-Based	All-purpose and beginner friendly	Safe with all toy materials	Easy to clean and condom safe	Dries faster and may need to reapply
Silicone-Based	Longer sessions and water play	Not safe with silicone toys	Very slick and long-lasting	Harder to clean and can damage silicone toys
Hybrid	A smoother feel than water-based	Often safe but check label	Nice balance of glide and easy cleanup	May still affect soft silicone toys

Always check the label or toy manufacturer's guidance if you're unsure.

A Quick Guide to Toy Materials

The material your toy is made from affects hygiene, safety, and comfort. Here’s what to look for.

✅ Body-Safe Materials (Recommended)

Silicone: Soft, flexible, and non-porous. Hypoallergenic and easy to sanitize.
Glass: Firm and sleek with a smooth finish. Great for temperature play and completely non-porous.
Stainless Steel: Heavy and durable with a smooth surface. Perfect for deep pressure and easy to sterilize.
ABS Plastic: Often used in bullets and toy bases. Non-porous and lightweight.

⚠️ Materials to Be Cautious Of

Jelly or Rubber: Flexible and affordable, but porous and often contains phthalates. Can hold bacteria and break down over time.
TPE or TPR (Thermoplastic Elastomers): Softer and stretchy but also porous. Use with care and clean well. Condoms recommended for shared use.

Choosing the right lube and toy material helps you play safely and feel your best. Look for non-porous, body-safe materials when possible and pair them with the lube that fits your needs. Your pleasure should feel good in every way.

How to Clean & Care for Your Toys

Toys that love you back deserve good care — and a little respect between uses.

Keeping your toys clean isn’t just about hygiene — it also helps your toys last longer and perform better. Whether it’s your first bullet vibe or a full collection of goodies, here’s how to make sure they stay fresh, safe, and ready for next time.

Basic Cleaning Steps

Clean Before and After Every Use
Always wash your toy both before and after using it. Even if it’s brand new, it's best to give it a gentle clean before first use to remove any dust or factory residue.
Use Warm Water and Mild Soap
If your toy is waterproof or splash-proof, use warm water and unscented mild soap or a specially formulated toy cleaner. For electric toys, spot-clean the parts that touch your body while keeping charging ports dry.
Dry Completely
Let your toy air dry on a clean towel, or pat dry with a lint-free cloth. Make sure it’s completely dry before storing it to prevent moisture buildup, which can cause mold or bacteria over time.
Check Waterproof Ratings
Look for labels like “waterproof,” “splash-proof,” or “submersible.” Never submerge a toy unless the manufacturer confirms it’s fully waterproof.

Cleaning Tips by Material

Material	How to Clean
Silicone, Glass, Stainless Steel	Wash with mild soap and warm water. For non-electric toys, you can also boil for 3–5 minutes or use a 10% bleach solution.
ABS Plastic	Use soap and water or toy cleaner. Avoid submerging unless clearly marked as waterproof.
Porous Materials	Clean thoroughly with warm soapy water. Consider using a condom if sharing. Replace more often due to material breakdown.

Porous materials (like jelly, rubber, or some TPE) cannot be fully sanitized. They can trap bacteria and should not be shared between partners.

How to Store Your Toys Safely

Clean toys are only half the equation — proper storage helps maintain their condition and keeps them ready for action.

Store toys separately in cloth bags or storage pouches to avoid cross-contamination and material damage.
Avoid direct contact between silicone toys. Medical-grade silicone can react with other silicone, causing them to degrade, melt, or become sticky over time. Use a soft pouch or barrier (like a lint-free cloth) between toys.
Keep them dry. Make sure everything is fully dry before storing to prevent mold or mildew.
Choose a cool, dark place. Avoid heat, sunlight, and humidity, which can break down materials.
Keep chargers and cables untangled. Store accessories in a separate pouch to avoid damage to charging ports or wires.

Bonus Tips

Label storage pouches for easier access and organization.
Clean shared toys more thoroughly, and always use a condom over insertable toys if switching between partners or between orifices.
Regularly inspect toys for cracks, discoloration, or damage — if it looks off, it’s time to replace it.

Do & Don't: Toy Cleaning & Storage Tips

✅ Do	❌ Don't
Clean toys before and after every use	Skip cleaning just because it "looks clean"
Use mild soap or a toy-safe cleaner	Use harsh cleaners, alcohol, or bleach (unless directed for boiling only)
Dry toys completely before storing	Store damp toys or seal them while still wet
Store toys in individual pouches or cloth bags	Toss all toys together in one drawer
Separate silicone toys or use a barrier (cloth or pouch)	Let silicone toys touch each other directly — they can degrade
Keep toys in a cool, dry, and dark place	Store toys in humid, hot, or sunlit areas
Use condoms with porous or shared toys	Share toys without cleaning or protection
Check for waterproof rating before submerging electric toys	Assume all toys can go in water
Inspect toys regularly for wear, damage, or stickiness	Keep using toys that show signs of damage or breakdown

Taking care of your toys is part of caring for yourself. A few extra minutes of cleaning and proper storage can keep your favorite products in great shape and your body safe and happy.